POSITIVITY is: the quality or state of being positive
Attaining and maintaining this state of being is probably the most important of my New Years resolutions this year. But how does one go about achieving and maintaining a positive attitude? Here is the first tip in a series of tips for positive thinking!
First, as Dr. Susan Campbell writes in her book, Saying What's Real,
don't believe everything you think.
Have you ever stepped back from your thoughts when you're tired or stressed and noticed how negative they tend to get in those situations? And how, just like we sometimes say things we don't mean, we can also think things we don't mean.
In the instance you notice yourself having angry, pessimistic thoughts, flash a big (imaginary) stoplight in front of your (mind's) eye! Step back and consider what you're thinking. If your thoughts contain any of these words: never, always, worst, or any other extreme words, you're probably not thinking accurately, but emotionally and reactively. Re-frame those thoughts into a true statement and include how you're feeling.
Negative thought: He never does anything around here!
True Statement: I am feeling angry because the trash is full again and I'm exhausted from chasing after kids all day.
I always try hard, after noticing a negative thought pattern, to think of a few very positive things about the man I love. This is, in essence, how I keep loving him through the stresses of life. For instance, "He is such a wonderful Papa. Look at the way he always diverts a tantrum!"
Since I began writing this post early this morning and am only finishing it at 10:00 o'clock at night, I could think, "I never get a minute to myself!" But instead I'm thinking, "I chose many more important tasks today. Children and husband included! And, I'm happy that I've finished it before going to bed!