I'm starting to understand the conflict of the working mother. I've only worked from home, really, for the last 6 years. Now, with our retail store opening in a few weeks the reality of life as a working mother is setting in.
It's more than just being a working mother, it's being working parents. Parents who will, at least at first, only be together with our children before school/work and on Monday evenings when the store is closed. Otherwise, Papa will be with the one or two who are home in the morning and I'll be with the three of them after school and weekend afternoon/evenings. But Papa won't be home until after bedtime 6 days a week. Two of those days whoever is at home will likely spend their day with a babysitter so my husband and I can work together in the store.
I feel good about showing my children that it's a good thing to take a risk and follow your dreams. I feel good showing them that an adult can absolutely love the work they do. I want to be careful to show them that I love being with them just as much as I love going to work. Even on days when the boy does nothing but shout toddler orders at me, like this morning. But as I watched my husband step out the door to work at getting the store ready for opening, I wished I was going with him. I feel 'stuck' at home with the kids and the laundry. I feel guilty about that feeling!
I think I'll put away the wine and retail books for a day and read the book I linked to above left. Maybe humor will help!